Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Why you don't want to sleep with me

I mean, besides the fact that by "sleep with" I mean literally "sleep alongside, near or next to" not "have sex with," there are also other reasons that the proverbial "you" wouldn't want to sleep with me and those mostly have to do with me acting like an awake person when I'm asleep, except an awake person with an impenetrable constellation of personal and psychological issues. That's all code for saying I snore, I grind my teeth, I toss and turn, but I also talk and walk in my sleep and these issues are exaggerated when I am under stress, and I find it very stressful to sleep with strangers nearby.

This is of particular interest right now because 1) I sleepwalked for the first time in awhile last night, accomplishing the task of removing a winter sock from my drawer with the purpose of stuffing it in the pipe that was spewing fire, which I'm sure worked smashingly because when I woke up the sock was in the middle of the room and nothing was on fire, so that's good. And 2) I'm slated to travel for my research assistanceship to Jefferson County Public Schools (a.k.a Louisville) next week, and I have not heard yet whether I'll be sharing a hotel room with one of the members on this project, all of whom seem very nice but not necessarily equipt to help me destroy the giant spiderweb that has been built across the room without disturbing the tarantulas with shark jaws.

Maybe if I tell them about my disability I'll be able to get accomodations, a.k.a, Houseboy as a chaperone.



  1. I toss and turn and talk and occasionally walk. But more than that...I snuggle. Anyone who is in my bed. Which can be awkward when it's my Aunt Dana or my sister or someone of that nature.

  2. Hah. I remember you doing these sorts of things. You could always just tell them if you end up sharing a room (better tell than show first...). My mom does the same sort of stuff (walks around the house, talks non-sensically, etc) so when you started doing stuff like that I was ok, I just recognized it as that thing my mom does.

    Remember that time you woke up trying to dial the phone in the hallway? Good times.

    Um. This is Jessica from college. It won't let me post unless I am anonymous. I am not some creepy dude that was watching you sleep in college or something, FYI. Don't freak out.

  3. Shine: Sleep snuggling is the cutest. I don't really snuggle even while awake because I have the jimmy everything and so does Houseboy. That and we're emotionally stunted.

    Jess: You make a good point about warning. I would have warned you way back then, but I wasn't aware of how often it happened since I didn't share a room with my sister by then. Also, I'm a little disappointed you're not a college stalker, it would really boost my ego.