Monday, March 30, 2009

Sex and the Children of the Perfect Man

The blog title was unwittingly suggested by Houseboy, who confused the hell out of me with his cleverness.  In the last week we actually watched THREE movies: Children of Men (which has been saved on our Tivo for about 6 months), The Perfect Man and the Sex and the City movie.  

Watching the Children of Men needs no excuse, because it is a movie that Smart People like, and we are Smart People who watch Smart Movies and have Smart Friends who suggest Smart People Movies to us.  The reason it sat on our Tivo for 6 months is that everytime Houseboy suggested we watch it I was like "Isn't that the post-apocalyptic tragic landscape one?  Let's watch Superbad again instead."  And we did.  Because we own that, and I love the penises.  

Anyway, we finally watched it last night because we had to eventually, because I have a moral obligation to my Tivo queue.  Turns out it's pretty depressing, but not actually as bad as The Road, with which it had many similarities, such as corpses burning on the roadside.  The overall message seemed to be that our society is about to hit a massive an apocolyptic downfall, but that the scary thing will actually be the way the survivors treat one another, rather than the mysterious attack from the outside.  In this way it's also like 28 Days Later, which I think got at the message a little more clearly and also more directly, what with zombies being more frightening than infertility, at least to me.  Interesting side note: in all these stories, it seems that the 3rd world and undeveloped countries also descend into madness and chaos, even though one could argue that the message is directed at us first-worlders who treat each other with such lack of basic humanity.  Sucks to be an Aboriginal person and have to pay for the sins of the rest of us, I guess.

So, the excuse I offer for watching The Perfect Man is that my sister is a brilliant and lovely and wonderful person, but her taste in all things entertainment-related is just wretched, in my opinion.  She apparently not only bought this movie, but accidentally bought it twice, and so was kind enough to give me her extra copy when she was out to visit last week.  Being the Not Snob that I am, I decided to watch it after work one day when my brain was fried.  Being the Snob that I am, I did not like it.  I'm all about the stupid movie and even the romantic comedy when I need stress relief.  I own Bring It On, for crying out loud.  And I've watched it recently.  It makes me happy. 

All that said, The Perfect Man just didn't do it for me.  I thought the acting was terrible, the plot was laughable and there were not enough musical numbers for my taste.  In its favor, it was not very long, and I didn't regret spending time on it as a result.  The Sex and the City movie, on the other hand, seemed to last for-fucking-ever.  I was never a fan of that show, and I wanted to tear my eyes out every time someone claimed to be like one of the characters, who I believe to be heinous female stereotypes who have actively frustrated the progression of feminism.  This may be why I disliked the movie, since it seemed to just be a really long version of an episode.  Also, since I wasn't a regular viewer I don't know for sure, but I got the impression when the movie started that the series ended on a sort of "happily ever after" for the characters, and all this movie did was uproot that and then re-plant it.  In other words, it had no actual reason for existing except to get more money out of the fans of the show.  The cardinal rule of storytelling is that you should have a reason why you are telling this particular story in a character's life, and I just didn't see it here.

Oh, and my excuse for watching it at all is that I came upon it just as it was starting.  That never happens!  

I need to start being more picky...


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