Monday, May 11, 2009

Pretentious Hipster

So, there's this new Facebook quiz that got circulated among my friends recently, and I made the mistake of taking it, despite everyone's universally disappointed comments on their results.  Those of you reading this on Facebook will probably know what I'm talking about.  It's the fantastically intuitive and eminently universal question of "Which Mac Stereotype Are You?"  Whoever wrote it got all clever pointing out how Macalester is all anti-establishment and hates labels and shit, which is actually why I took it, because I like labels and boxes and the establishment and all that.

Anyway, my result was "Pretentious Hipster," and they predicted that I currently work in a coffee shop and have ironic facial hair.  Well, they're right in that any facial hair I have is certainly ironic.  Other than that, this doesn't seem very accurate to me.  All right, so I moved to Uptown Minneapolis after graduation and worked in a record store and watched independent films at the Lagoon.  That was because I had no money.  And that was because I was an English major.  And that was because I didn't think about my future after college until I was exactly 22 1/2 and graduation had just ended and all my shit was in a Pontiac Sunbird and I had nowhere to go.  And that was because I had a really hot boyfriend who was a really good kisser and etcetera and we were going to move in together (somewhere) and probably get two phone lines so his very Catholic mother would not find out.

Ok, and yeah, I own a t-shirt or two that has some kind of incomprehensible photo/slogan combination and was bought at Metro Mart for ten cents along with a pair of oversized men's pants and a cross-stitched pillow that reads "Forty is Farty."  But someday I'll be forty andI'll sit on that and fart and then it won't be ironic anymore, so that takes care of that issue.

Anyway, what it all comes down to is that none of the questions on that quiz had answers like "because I never really thought about it" or "I spent most of my time drinking and studying" or "the red-assed baboons," so it really can't reflect my college OR post-college personality very accurately.  


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