Thursday, August 6, 2009

Dreams are like pictures, if I'm not in them and nobody's naked, I don't care.

So, since I know everyone loves to hear about other people's dreams*, I'm going to tell you all about how I had a dream last night that I adopted an autistic child, and then cured him of autism by following him to the desert, which was being overrun by maggots that swarmed over a herd of donkeys and ate them alive and then came after us, and we escaped by getting into a school bus and driving away and crashing into a dinner party being given in our honor, where I got yelled at for upsetting the child and was told to rub his ears to make him calm down.

I think it was an anxiety dream because I found out that one of our orientation activities at school will involve a big bulletin board with our names and places of birth on it, and we're supposed to interact with one another based on shared culture or something, but I was born in Macon, Georgia and I'm terrified of the people who will approach me based on that fact, since I only lived there for 9 months and apparently didn't even wear clothes for that whole time. I wish I had lied on my application.

*The title is a paraphrase of Dennis from Always Sunny in Philadelphia. And I agree with him, but I'm telling you my dream anyway. Because I don't care what you want to hear.


  1. Is the autistic child your mind's manifestation of your discomfort with socializing with people?

  2. Oooh, everyone's going to think you're southern! This should be fun.

  3. Saturday: Very nice interpretation! Is your husband teaching you psychology now?

    Shine: That's exactly what I'm afraid of.

  4. Feel free to take a recording device.